Do you remember the infamous exploits of Captain Calamity? Here was a man who repeatedly sank, capsized and ran aground on his various (usually homemade) boats and then expected the RNLI to come and rescue him every time the inevitable happened. Well a recent incident in Essex suggests he might have a couple of pretenders to his throne...

DIY day fisher disaster

A true DIY day fisher disaster: The late and not so great Essex Special.




On Easter Monday, a homemade boat came to grief off the Essex coast on virtually its first day at sea. Designed and constructed by two men in their 20s from insulation boards, coat hangers, plywood and silicone adhesive, the eight-foot vessel, which cost a total of £9 to create, had managed to survive the bulk of the weekend while being used as a fishing platform. However, when the oars broke and an offshore breeze set in, the men found themselves drifting hopelessly away from their intended destination of the Martello Beach Holiday Park.

Interestingly, neither of these keen amateur fishermen had a lifejacket, a proper means of communication or a secondary means of propulsion and more alarmingly still, one of the men was apparently unable to swim. Luckily, however, they managed to raise the alarm with the Thames Coastguard on a mobile phone and the Clacton RNLI duly headed out in a bid to interrupt the rightful course of natural selection.

The men were rescued and soundly re-briefed about the technical demands of seagoing vessels before their ‘boat’ was humanely destroyed. Local RNLI volunteer Joff Strutt, who was involved in the rescue, said: “They had been out fishing when their oars snapped, leaving them helpless. The men were taken aboard the lifeboat and checked over before they were taken ashore to Clacton Coastguard for some safety advice.” And yet despite being called out on a rescue that shouldn’t have been necessary, Mr Strutt went on to describe the affair with impressive benevolence as nothing more than "a project that went pear-shaped.” You’re not wrong Joff.

For more outlandish seafaring exploits on boats.com see: Mad Mariners: four unbelievable seafaring exploits and Kitesurfing in high heels.

The £9 DIY day fisher disaster

This DIY day fisher disaster zone cost all of £9 to construct.



For more advice on choosing a fishing boat, read Dave Barham's guide to fishing boats.

Written by: Alex Smith
Alex Smith is a journalist, copywriter and magazine editor with a long history in boating and a happy addiction to the water. He’s worked on boats, lived on boats, bought boats, sold boats and – when he’s not actually on board a boat – he can generally be found in his Folkestone office, tapping away at the computer and gazing out to sea.